never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I need water and some morals
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
