My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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