i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
