I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
