conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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