So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
