She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize