What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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