Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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