He is an equal opportunity slut.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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