I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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