And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
