Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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