Fuck appropriateness.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
