That's intense
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
