tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
