Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
