I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
