My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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