He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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