How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
