i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
