You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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