thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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