these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
