umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
