Well apparently he's into motor boating.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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