No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
