I must be too annoying 4 u.
I want to have your abortion
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
you never un-have a 4some
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
