I must be too annoying 4 u.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
