Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
Randomize
