yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize