Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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