let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
