My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
We got so high we made milksteak
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
