I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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