I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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