is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
be right there i have to get my cape
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
