I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
