Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
