White coat. Heels.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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