bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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