He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Randomize