fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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