I faked an abortion last night.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
