I wanna passion pit in your ass
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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