508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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