I can tuck mytits in my pants
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
