Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
