Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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